I swear we are not In Her Majesty’s Secret Service. We just really like this beach. White Bay on Jost van Dyke is one of the kings of Caribbean beaches. St. John’s beaches are fantastic. And they’re Quiet. Which is great, but White Bay is fun because it is, well, it’s really active. Beach bars, hammocks, total strangers that will be your best friends by day’s end. It’s a really entertaining change of pace once in awhile. And you can tell your friends you took a side trip to England. For today’s visit though, no passport required. Go here!

How’d you like to have to walk around town in a Gilligan hat with a piece of black cardboard over your face? Being a critic is tough. But so is Charlie. We’ve got a couple more dispatches in our in-box from Charlie, but before we wheel them out, just a note to make these better. We set this up so anybody can post a comment and say anything. All in the name of fairness. All comments are welcome. The more, the better. And here’s why that’s helpful. If Charlie has a good experience, or a bad one, that’s one opinion. If a string of comments reveals a trend of good or bad experiences, then a credible dining guide emerges. Before you know it, we’ll all be a regular St. John Zagat! And THAT is the long-term goal. Goofy Charlie can’t keep St. John’s restaurants on their toes all by himself…but we all can…starting here. (Now you’re getting it!)  

About villa videos: If there’s a video, it means we know the house. Full disclosure: This is a paid advertisement, but the comments below are our own.  

Welcome our newest advertiser! Morningside Villa is in Klein Bay. Klein Bay is one of St. John’s best-kept secrets. Here’s where it is: South Shore Road past the Westin, past Chocolate Hole, then just past the Rendezvous Point development. Right turn and down a paved switchback or two. This neighborhood is really quiet, and the few villas that are there are good ones, and there are fantastic views, mostly of Rendezvous Bay (arguably the most “turquoise” bay on the island.) Klein Bay is part of Rendezvous Bay. You read about villas that say they’re “within walking distance of the beach” and that is often BS. Morningside Villa is literally 2 minutes by hoof to Klein Bay…and the only people who are going to be on this beach are likely staying nearby. This villa is cool. 4 bedrooms, 2 up, 2 down, all in their own wings. A huge kitchen. A great pool and deck. Very private. Great place. Great neighborhood. Learn more about Morningside here. And watch the video here!       

Sunday’s NYT Travel section cover story features 10 Caribbean islands and why they’re hot. Check them out, because there is just no room to park at Maho anymore.

There’s also a “no passport required” story in the In Transit column with a villa pool photo it identifies as St. John. Anybody recognize the house? We don’t. (Grab the office copy of the Times and take a look. It’s on page 2.) In Transit also notes Delta’s new nonstop flights from NY JFK to St. Thomas starting in March.

 And as evidence of how worried other islands are about the new passport requirements, there’s an ad for the Bahamas that says if you spend at least two nights on Nassau, the tourism folks will reimburse you for you the cost of getting passports for your entire family.

Air fare update: We just bought tickets for February travel on US Airways for $268/RT. That is just $10 more than the cheapest DCA-STT fare we’ve ever had. You might want to take a look at fares right now.

Check out a couple of ongoing building sagas at blogs we know of. One of our favorites is Arc du Soleil, a house that’s getting pretty close to done in Virgin Grand Estates. Harley, in the blue shirt, has been acting as his own general contractor. Brave soul. These guys haven’t been waiting for the place to be finished to have parties either. Check out their “inspection party” entries. Concordia Estates also has a blog going for its new yoga pavilion. And there’s a house in Calabash called Amansala that appears to be getting under way soon, and they just started updating again. We also hear a couple of other brand new construction blogs are in the works. We’ll post links when they’re up and running.  In the meantime:  Arc du Soleil building blog and Concordia Estates blog and Amansala blog .    

You need to buy this DVD. It’s a new, 30 minute documentary produced for the National Park’s 50^th anniversary that recounts the history of the formation of the Park. It is nicely edited and beautifully told and includes great, old photos and film, and some fun interviews with folks who were there a half century ago. (We’d love to see a second DVD full of more of these interviews!) You can order the DVD directly from the Friends of the Virgin Islands National Park here.

And, in On-StJohn’s latest video interview, meet producer Steve Simonsen and get a sneak peak! Watch here.

So you can’t park at Maho Bay? Or, you can, but only in the legal spots and not where there is no parking. But you wouldn’t know that because there ARE NO SIGNS. (And as you can see, there’s not a whole lot of parking anyway.) There is a Source story this week about people getting parking tickets over the weekend at Maho Bay because they were parked illegally. In response to protests, here’s what the Source quotes chief ranger Mark Marschall as saying: “We’re trying to avoid having signs.” Well that’s helpful! If you want to read it, double park your browser here.   

VIDEO ALERT! A rock-a-fella loved.  LS Rockefeller’s love affair with St. John, and why he was only part of the story of the National Park. An interview with Steve Simonsen about the Park’s smokin’ new DVD commemorating its 50th anniversary, tomorrow on On-StJohn! (And how you can get the DVD.)

In his latest restaurant review, Charlie Joseph tells On-StJohn what he thinks of one of the island’s newest restaurants, Ocean Grill.

There should be a big sign out in front of Ocean Grill that says ATTENTION TOURISTS: WE’RE TRYING TO BE A FANCY-PANTS PLACE. Had I known, I woulda brought my cloth napkin attitude with me. I must’ve had various wait staff say “It would be my pleasure, sir” about a dozen times (and I didn’t believe them once.)

I read about this place’s emphasis on innovative dishes. My lunch? “A” for effort, but my pulled pork sandwich was gooey and tough. It was accompanied by a little two-compartment plate with a couple of shavings of red cabbage (the chef’s deconstructed nod to the coleslaw that should’ve come with it) and a tiny little pre-determined squirt of ketchup. Please don’t pre-determine how much ketchup I will use. Especially if you’re going to serve me limp, lukewarm fries. The cold melon soup would have made a good smoothie. It did not make a good cold melon soup. And the prices were high. Ocean Grill gets an “A” for location. It’s an excellent, open air space. The remodeling job is first class. But me thinks both the staff and the kitchen need to lighten up.

Ouch! Okay, thanks Charlie. We’d love to hear from other folks and see if they enjoyed Ocean Grill.

The Beach Bar video was the most popular video ever posted on the old Bongo Bongo site. Here’s an updated version, but with a weird twist. Instead of Jimmy Buffet or Kenny or something predictable, we set the wave watching to Debussy. You’ll either like this or hate this. But a warning: DO NOT WATCH THIS BEFORE GOING INTO AN IMPORTANT MEETING. You’ll be sure to fall asleep. (Watch it AFTER an important meeting.)  Watch Cruz Bay Claire de Lune here!

Welcome our newest advertiser!  Coupon St. John (get it?) This venture is just now getting traction, and you should investigate. And here’s why. The more people use these coupons, the more businesses will want to offer them and the more that happens, the more coupons we all get, and before you know it, real estate companies will be offering us  discounts! (Oh, wait. That’s already happening.)

Seriously. Check it out and print up a few before your next trip. We know Gail and Peter, who came up with this great idea. They live on a boat in St. John, and they have a house in the Great Southwest USofA on a road called Bad Dog Lane. How can you not like people like that. Go here.

Got your passport?  Good. But you don’t need one. No, wait. You do. No you don’t. Do too! Do not! Man, it’s amazing how something so simple got so repeatedly mis-reported so much! Although as everything post-9/11, the new passport requirements are, well confusing. YOU DO NOT NEED A PASSPORT TO RETURN TO THE UNITED STATES FROM THE U.S. VIRGIN ISLANDS. (Unless you’re not an American, in which case we reserve the right to ask you some really stupid questions about why you don’t look and talk like us.)

Now…you’d think the USVI tourism folks would be making huge waves over this. Quoted in Tuesday’s Wall Street Journal, USVI Dept. of Tourism Director Henry de Lagarde. “We didn’t want to come out and rub it in their nose, so we did nothing,” referring to the rest of the Caribbean islands that are affected by the new rules. We did nothing?  At least hotels are. The USVI Hotel and Tourism Association has promotions going that can knock 20% off some lodging, including deals at the Westin.  Check out the Assocation’s deals here. Oh. And get a passport anyway. Your kids will think you’re cool. State Department’s official passport site here.

With debris and rubble all around, the old Bongo Bongo outhouse was the only thing left standing after the island’s latest major earthquake!

Yes, there was another earthquake. No, there was no reported damage. It was a MINOR earthquake two dozen miles north of the island that measured a reported 3.7 magnitude. And there was one last October, and two in August and one in June and one last January. And those are just the ones that made the local news. According to the St. John Source, the Puerto Rican Seismic Network has actually recorded 156 quakes across the territory THIS MONTH! Now you know why the pictures on the walls are always crooked in those villas. (Read about the latest little shaker here.)

Looks like mangroves have been planted at Enighed Pond. It was something the Army Corps of Engineers required as part of the new barge arrival facility. Good thing, ‘cuz even though the new barge dock is nice, it’s really ugly. The mangroves will grow and cover the boggy landfill behind the dikes and help protect against erosion. Mangroves may not sound all that exciting, but the Friends of the VI National Park has a couple of mangrove-centric outings scheduled this year. You missed this weekend’s kayak tour of the mangroves in Hurricane Hole, But on March 24, an island-wide tour led by VINP’s chief of resource management, Rafe Boulon aboard the Sadie Sea includes snorkel tours of mangroves and seagrass beds. Learn more about it here.